we can live like jack and sally

Monday, August 30, 2004

cant blieve tt ms heng actually went to ms tay n told her abt wad happened...i cant blieve it...such a disappointment...i was so pissed with her...alr very angry with her but this was the ultimate last straw...got such a shock when ms tay came over n she was like, 'u got into trouble with ms heng rite? learn lars...jus learn...' the only saving grace frm this thing is tt ms tay was smiling was smilin when she said it so think she understds...but i was so angry!!! why did she haf to blow up the friggin matter n go to my CT?? like wad the hell is her prob?? yes ive been missing guitar pracs, but its bcos of meetings for lib...when i called her b4 she was like, why do u haf to come to me? tell her the guiar tcher wants a letter n she REFUSES to write...sayin i shld solve it at my level n not bring it up to her...argh!!!!!wtf... summore say tt she cant solve the probs for me...argh...cant stand her...n cant say anything summore cos hafta face her for 2 yrs...man!!!!! shit.
only gd thing tt has happened this wk, actualli hasnt happened yet...n tt is ill be goin bac stnicks...rock on... lookin forward!! n i refuse to do Aces' day...

blaque stepped into the dark at 7:17 PM!

Sunday, August 29, 2004

jus read goh's blog...n i miss everyone...
miss the familiarity n ease with which things happened...when we talked to each other....and it wasnt a mere unloading of problems n burdens...but a serious heart-to-heart talk...something tt i miss...u guys nva fail to say wad i need to hear...n even when words dun suffice, u guys will always be jus there...still rmb when during 'o's period when i was crying in the canteen...all of ya jus came over n was there for me....wanna thank u!!! :) u pple are irreplaceable...miss goin to stnicks...walking into sch...walking out...finding pple to walk out with me...seeing sonya every recess...seeing u guys in class everyday..even during recess...cos all o u dun wanna eat...jo goh n her mango...haha how she spent dunno how much of her allowance on mango...teo n her food...n her bread...:) n bus 25..susan n her jay chou...n her ignoring wangjian...actuali we all ignored him...shuting n her songs...her cute little fringe...her laughter...baoru n her bks...her nobody blieves not dyed hair...her sitting bside me...
~ You can always tell a real fren: when u make a fool of urself, he doesnt feel that uve done a permanent job~
tts how it was with u guys...with u pple, i cld always be myself n not be judged...true frens nva leaves the heart..u pple arent goin anywhere....:)

blaque stepped into the dark at 5:00 PM!

Saturday, August 28, 2004

jus finished doin my PW stuff...like phew...man i really hate it... sux its so tedious...jus watched tkd finals olympics....hm ok i dun understd....it wasnt tt interestg...tot they'd like attack like siao but kept defendg....
hate it when im pissed+depressed+moody but dunno the reason..

blaque stepped into the dark at 11:01 PM!

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Gp essay tmr...argh...hafta go online to search for info...prob goin to hafta write abt euthanasia or abortion...sigh gotta make up my mind abt my stand...but think im goin to end up arguing the moral aspects of things...which feels like a weaker argument...but one which i feel more strongly for...hmm...ohwell...
anyway anyone goin bac stnicks for tchers' day??? tell me! then we meet up!!! :):)
was talking to simin abt our future today...haha n wad kind of guys we go for...hm...have a pretty gd idea...tho im atracted to those very cute n AC kind rite, i prob wun end up with someone liddat...yixin thinks so too...haha she says ill end up with someone quiet..haha but not tt extreme lars...hm...but definitely must be someone i can talk to...can tolerate my 'madness' sometimes when i become abit high...haha able to make me laugh...:) n everyone thinks ill end up with those very perfect kind of family haha...rmb last yr when we envisioned each other's futures?? haha mine basically still the same...:) haha think teo's is the funniest...haha how she n her husband wld eat dinner in silence...n when they fight it wld be sth like a cold war...haha...qt funny...sigh...miss u guys...everyday i think of sth tt we used to do...when we were bac in stnicks...n sometimes i wish u guys were right bside me...u guys understood me best...n ill treasure our frenship forever!!!!!!!!!! :):):)

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:37 PM!

feel so angry.
jus typed out an entry n it din appear.
feel so pissed for my twin.
SHE better stop wadeva she's doin.
F.
baoru left ytd morn.
miss ya...
so faraway.
but rmb...always in each other's heart!!
:)
must stop cursing.
funny how im cursing more than when i was arnd sonya more.
haha..
ohwell..
stop slacking.
mugmugmug.

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:36 PM!

Saturday, August 21, 2004

jus watched the table tennis match...so sad...we were so damn close...sigh ohwell...now gotta fight for 3rd placing...jiayou!!

realised sth today...by the end of j1...i wun be able to see him anymore...n we'll probably jus fade frm all contact...yea tts prob wad will happen..no more seeing him arnd..

i better buck up for promos..if i wanna get gd results, 1st ive to put in the hard wk...i shld noe tt...if ive done it once before..i can do it again...no regrets..work for it.

my fren's going overseas this tues n i din even noe..wad kind of fren am i?

i just hate my life now.

everyday
a mindless void
within
nothingness
this hollowness
in my heart
the bitter taste
of life
the sweetness
of a rush of blood
filling my heart
my mind
empty no more

crap
even tt sucked
wad am i writing
havnt written a story in ages
maybe tts wad i need to do
i need to study
study
study
study
i can do it

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:44 PM!

Friday, August 20, 2004

JOY WAS BORN YESTERDAY!!!!!!!! HAHA...
ok for the benefit of all those who dun noe...my sis gave birth to JOY yesterday!!! whoa it was like a 8-hr labour...n she went for the 1st 6-hrs without painkillers...was only after tt when she cldnt take it n had to take the painkillers...man i seriously pei4 fu2 her man...she must have been in intense pain... baby JOY is so CUTE!!!!!!!! omg....really veri cute...ive never seen a newborn before and when i finally saw her she was onli like wad, 2 hrs old???! yea! way cool...she's so cute...has really big eyes...haha n her lung capacity ars...other babies sleeping peacefully in the nursery then she started crying so loudly...one monent she was all quiet the next she was crying like nobody's business...she';s loud...:) n my poor jie fu...when i saw him ytd he looked so dazed...hadnt slept a wink in dunno how long...haha ask him y he din sleep the night before n he was like...'scared they cannot wake me up...' lol...laffed like mad when i heard it...haha...:):)
today was such a happy day!! due to alot of factors..:) HAPPY !! ~ haha...

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:41 PM!

Monday, August 16, 2004

had bio SPA today...skill C n D...like killer lars...sigh...actually it wasnt tt bad...kinda panicked but after tt finally managed to calm down n finish it...cld have been much worse...:)
happy day!!! haha really went mad with simin this morn man...we were like walking arnd jus laffing nonstop...haha...qt fun tho...ohya...was on the same bus this morn as our new maths tcher...haha..almost din recognise him...:)
was talking to HIM today too! haha...for like grand total of 2 mins...haha...he was asking me like wad were we studying for...cos got SPA...then how cum we were studyin during a break..haha...then he had tt incomprehensible look on his face..haha... then after tt he came over again to say hi...n look at wad i was doing...:):) was like daydreaming during econs lect after tt lars...haha...:):)
ohwell...jus got hm...tmr got mitosis n meiosis test n still must do diff tut 3...sigh...beta go do liaos...

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:05 PM!

Saturday, August 14, 2004

screw it. screw my fucking screwed up life. fuck it.

blaque stepped into the dark at 9:50 PM!

haha went to mac's today after bio lect to actually study...haha ok lars...din do fantastically much but more than if i had been at home...:) then after tt went to my aunt's house n saw my nephew...SO CUTE!!!!!!!!! OMG...seriosly he is the cutest kid i have eva seen... he has a PERFECTLY round face...so chubby...has a mesmerising smile...omg so CUTEEE!!!!!!! haha yea he's damn cute...:) played with him for awhile...then was thinking, my sis's baby coming into the world soon!! think it's down to a matter of days liaos...haha so xciting...:) she's called JOY...n damn if it isn't apt...:)
ohya mrs koh went on maternity leave already, and we got this new maths tutor who was previously frm HC too...but fear not, he's not frm tchs...haha..:P he's damn cute...not very gdlookin actuali but think he's very charismatic..hm...noe qt a few pple hu are actualli not THAT gdlookin but are damn charismatic...hm i guess that makes a big diff...:):)
got so much hw to do!!! argh...gonna slp at 3am today...(pls, u noe tts not goin to happen..;)

blaque stepped into the dark at 8:26 PM!

Thursday, August 12, 2004

update on swimming lesson!! haha...quite fun today...managed to swim sth ttt looks suspiciously like freestyle but not qt there yet haha...learning lars...so happy today he actually taught us haha... was tellin me tt i swim qt fast but must come up to breathe haha...which he was tryin to teach me to no avail haha...then we were tryin to learn. ok i was trying to learn how to tread water frm my fren...guess where? haha in the beginner's pool...:) where when i stand the water reaches my chest..haha..:)but qt fun...hope evry lesson will be liddat! was so pissed off at everybody today...then kinda cheered up later...dun let stuff liddat get me down...sigh, wah realised i get pissed like damn easily...close to nth like triggered it off lars...but ohwell, not 1st time...:)

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:28 PM!

~flyaway from me

i...
miss ur smiles
miss ur 'hi's
miss ur laughter
miss our conversations
miss ur letters
miss ur sweets
miss ur msgs
miss opening the box
n seeing ur letter for me
miss reading 'em
miss knowing u spent at least
a portion of ur day thinkin' of me
miss talkin to u
miss u
+

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:24 PM!

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

yakitori!!! haha dunno i spelt it correctly or not but who cares...:) its the jap satay tingy...omg so damn nice!!! jus ate the pork with asparagus one...rocks!! haha just came bac frm taka's kino...went to buy bks for HC library...everyone(exco) entitled to one below $20...kinda like reward for our hard wk for carnival...:) cant help comparing to sngs...when we had 2K + to spend n we jus threw in bk after bk...i went mad at kino lars...so many bks i wanted!!! esp tt brenda joyce's 'deadly promise'...damn nice... but got sandra brown's newest bk instead...:) haha happy!!!
sonya came over yesterday morn...was so happy!!! haha she overslept somemore...but in the end her dad drove her over...haha kinda figured she would oversleep...:) expected...haha...:P so happy to see her!!!! she gave me the bear, shoelaces n jerry maguire vcd!!! haha...:) damn cool...jus talked n chatted like old times...abt PL...abt stnicks...uni...movies...sch...probs...man...everything...seriously, im so glad ive her as my best fren, i can tell her ANYTHING...im nva goin to meet another person like her...still rmb the last time b4 'O's tt period...i was jus talkin to her in the canteen then i suddenly started cryin cos i was so stressed out...i noe i like totally freaked her out lars...(yea i was really stressed) but she kept reassuring me..tellin me i cld do it n it was fine..n it really made me blieve her..n in myself..i still rmb how i wldnt stop crying n kept scrunching all the tissue..until she had to take me by the hand to the sink to wash my face haha... i duuno y, but tt memory is still very fresh..hm well sonya if ure reading this, i noe ure prob rollin' ur eyes n think tt this is super mushy, but i hafta say this ok, tho u already noe lars...:)
im truly glad to have a fren like u..im seriously happy that ive a best fren like u..u'll always be my bestest fren..:)miss u!!!
today...or tmr...im goin to hafta start my muggin'...principal told us promo criteria today...hm better wk harder if i wanna produce the results i will be happy with...noe wad, i shall stop aiming just to pass...how can i?? tt shld not be the mentality...im aiming for As!!!!!!!!!! aim high...have the right attitude n the wk's half done...gotta wk hard!!! everybody jiayou!!!!!!!!!
:)

blaque stepped into the dark at 6:18 PM!

Monday, August 09, 2004

wanyu, your signature color is Sterling Blue

You've got a good head on your shoulders and you're not afraid to use it. Serious, intellectual types like you meet their match with a cool color that sparkles with the same striking intelligence as you do. That's why Sterling Blue is the ideal match for you! This is not to say that you've always got your head in a book. Not by any stretch. While you may not be the person at the party kicking off the karaoke, you're probably the one starting up stimulating conversations and making your cohorts chuckle with your quick wit. You're likely to have an insatiable curiosity that's catchy, and friends who know that you are a great person to turn to when they need a logical head to help them sort through their problems. So keep it up with your sterling hue of blue. You probably have a way of keeping things deep that people truly appreciate!

blaque stepped into the dark at 1:21 PM!

~City Of Angels was showing on ch 5 last night...dint manage to catch it but ive watched it b4 n it remains one of the saddest n most awesome show ive watched...its already like damn super sad, then they play the sarah maclachlan song 'angel' and u just wanna cry lars...love tt song...so haunting...but damn nice...think if i had watched it last night i'd haf started cryin again...ya i cry damn easily as u all noe...sigh...he gave up being an angel for her, but she had to be taken away from him in the end...how cruel can life get...they could only be together for such a short time... but to him, i guess it would have been worth it.. man im really in a sentimental mood...:)

~I'd fall from heaven...just to be by your side...for in you...i've found heaven~

blaque stepped into the dark at 9:56 AM!

Friday, August 06, 2004

OMG!!! im like super damn happy now...i had previously lost contact with this fren of mine, kaini, and now she has managed to find me again!!! haha...:) so happy...really miss her...i was still pretty sad the other day cos i was thinking abt her and how we've drifted apart...but such a coincidence the other day, i was jus telling yixin abt how if ure really gd frens, u can jus pick up frm where u left off...n i think tts so true...we really jus picked up frm where we left off...so happy!!!!!!!!!!!!
was talkin to her abt life in hc...and she was encouraging me... felt really touched..she was tellin me tt i must find bac my lost confidence, tt i must tell myself tt im not stupid or anything, n stop belittling myself...n tt im still the same old gek n im still smart n a confident gurl!!!haha...must stop thinking negatively..
only by workin hard will i be able to get the results i want...so JIAYOU!!! :):)
n kaini, frens 4eva!!! i'll always be there for u...jus pick up the fone...:)

blaque stepped into the dark at 11:14 PM!

heys!! haha national day celebrations today...haha..think my class super enthu..! we were told tt we can wear like either a red top n the HC skirt or white top...either tt or we can turn up in sch u...haha which to me, i din even haf to think to make up my mind wad to wear lars...haha...:)haha to teo: i totally get wad u mean when u talk abt bac in SN...bac then we were like forced to wear lars...i mean when we had a choice, who actualli wore?? haha...think we were a super not enthu class, tho united in our refusal to wear haha...but i miss tt...i miss those times where we jus sat bac n laughed at those pple who wore...i miss havin frens who dun haf to ask me wheter i'll be wearing...mayb im realli not enthu...but tts how i am...haha was the same for racial harmony day...i din wear...like 'hello???' haha...sigh...4 charity rocks!!! man i miss those not enthu times...:):)

blaque stepped into the dark at 12:52 PM!

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

happy 17!! :)

my bdae today!!! haha...so happy!! im finally 17!! have always liked tt no..dun ask me y..:) haha veri happy today...got prezzies!!! haha...yixin n simin n shufang got me a really nice top frm 37 degrees...veri nice!! haha...fave colour blue summore...yay finally got new top liaos...:) haha then may gave me a pair of earrings and a scrungie...veri cute!!! thnx pple...:)
so happy...woke up n received quite alot of happy bdae msgs....frm jinyuan...shufang...ben..sonya..susan...shuting...yiwen...fangyi...:)haha... thanks to all of ya!!! :)
haha ohya and he rmbed my bdae!! haha on MSN ytd...:) then today he wished me happy bdae!! haha kinda mouthed it to me...:) felt damn happy afterwards...:)
din feel any diff altho im 17 now...dun feel smarter..dun feel wiser...dun feel enlightened...haha jus felt damn happy...:) haha but i do feel a kind of determination, ya noe wad i mean?? hm...jus a kind of feelin like, already 17 liaos...mus be more grown-up and achieve more in life...n tts wad i'll do!! filled with a kind of confidence now...17! wad a superb age...i know i can do it, and i will..:)
haha later still got cake-cutting n more prezzies...:P exciting!!! :)
haha...jiayou!!! work hard, and it'll definitely pay off...it always does...i shld know firsthand...:) !!! ~

blaque stepped into the dark at 7:25 PM!

Monday, August 02, 2004

was just lookin' thru the photo album on sally's blog...and jus felt so sad...i miss stnicks!! i think i spent the best 4 yrs of my life there...there, i made frens tt i know wld be with me my whole life, had lotsa fun and made many precious memories...
miss...
reading under the table during lesson time
vanessa calling me librarian
the pictures that we took non-stop near end of yr
the mugging before the test
having 3 test in a row in 1 day
the desperate tryong to get ans frm other classes b4 HCL test
the classrm
the painting of it
the abusing of the class comp
the bench in the corridor where we'd jus sit
the toilet
the popping by to sonya's classrm
eating with her almost everyday during recess
susan n tingx's crazy antics tt always makes me laff
leen's blurness
rmb the time we bluffed her during chem expt tt the stuff in her test-tube was black (when it was white)
teo's witty remarks (sayin things tt always make me laff)
goh listening to my probs
baoru talkin to me on the fone
how i always turned arnd in class to talk to u guys sitting bhind
...
now i can no longer do all that
but i'll always hold all these memories dear
+

blaque stepped into the dark at 5:35 PM!

1 more day to my bdae!!!!!!!!!!!!! :):):) haha...

blaque stepped into the dark at 10:38 AM!