Sunday, December 12, 2004
whoas...qt long nva update my blog...not tt i havnt been online...but it's like dunno...jus didnt feel like blogging...abit tired of writing...i dunno...but decided to blog today after all...hmmm been taking a rest these days cos mon n tues no stocktake!!!! haha yay! =) sigh acty think it's qt unfair lars..the other half of the exco like conveniently no need to do anything...then like can t force them to also...then ms heng abit like treat it we HAVE to do it like that....hello can she show some thanks n appreciation or not....will nva forget how she suan me tt time....when i told her i was sick, she was like,' really ars? then u better don't come tmr...later u spread ur germs to everyone..' wahlau tell her to go screw off lars....stupid idiot...then the other time she acty dared to scold me my mum didnt teach me manners....honestly i didnt feel that there was anything wrong in wead i did....yixin didnt think so too....tts y i was so friggin' mad lars.....asshole...urgh cant wait till i dun hafta see her face again...want phase two to be over soon....haha ohya then tt time i came hm at 5...then i jus totally crashed....so tired.....then slept till 8pm...haha cos i went my parents' rm to slp...n i locked the door...so i tot like when i woke up totally disorientated, i was like oh shit did i lock my parents out?? cos i tot it was the next day alr....haha..=) too tired i guess...
been starting on abit of wk...but i keep putting it off lars...cant! realised tt i must really keep to the schedule i plan...so i must go do wk later!!! have put it off long enough....yup..must go n plan by when must finish wad....then can start work alr!! haha...=)
ohya must start buying x'mas cards...
haha poor ben go army alr...haha jus like wad, 8 days after his a's? haha...poor thing...;)
everyday i find myself plagued with the same thoughts...the same worries...the same reminders of what had been...n how come it's not the same now...i find myself worrying...how come i cant replicate what i used to do? n i get myself so worried that i seem to be stopping myself even before i try....so instead of saying i cant even before i try....im going to try first...n i know that ive alr succeeded halfway n thus i'd be able to do it...
like what tings told me...don't bother or care abt other pple...jus do my own thing...jus do my own wk n dun care abt other pple...=) yup n that's what im goin to do...=)
blaque stepped into the dark at 11:50 AM!
me
I stare up at the pure white ceiling
fans whirring softly
A deathly silence in the room
Fear grips me by the throat
As I watch Death slowly glide
My wrinkled hand grips the bedsheet
As I begin a silent litany of prayer
He glides past the sleeping child
in the opposite bed
past the lady gazing listlessly towards the window
I struggle to breathe
Strange wheezing noises
The demons within me rage
Wreaking havoc
As my feeble heart sputters and chokes
My eyes close in pain
Flying open
In shocked remembrance
To see
His dark hand reach for me
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